Moving on can be a difficult process after a breakup. While some jump into new relationships quickly, others choose to deliberately remain single for a while so as to work on self.
Wanting to be in a serious relationship and being ready are two very different things.
Although we may think we are really ready, our minds and hearts often betray us when we realize too late that we are pushing our partners and the relationship away through certain actions.
1. You talk about your ex a lot
The first step in moving on is accepting that the previous relationship is over and it is time to move on.
Bringing up a past partner in a new relationship either means you really are not ready to let go of them, or you are not ready to let go of your previous life.
Either way, that push and pool, emotional uncertainty casts a shadow on the possibility of a serious commitment between you and your current partner.
2. You’re not happy with yourself
After accepting the situation, the next thing to do is to find your own happiness.
We all have things we’d like to change about ourselves and insecurities to work on, but to quote RuPaul, “if you can’t love yourself, how in the hell are you going to love somebody else?” Your self-esteem (or lack thereof) can take a major toll on your relationship.
3. You care more about finding the “perfect partner”
Love is exciting and fulfilling when you meet someone who blends well with your personality, but relationships always require a lot of work and responsibility in order to sustain it.
Do not spend all your time and energy finding someone who meets every single requirement on your list. Instead, work on being the best version of yourself.
4. You have a hard time apologizing or admitting when you’re wrong
A relationship is a two-way traffic. You have to give in order to receive. There’s one word that describes what every relationship needs: compromise.
If you have a habit of thinking you’re always right and would rather hold onto your ego instead of making things right, then you may want to re-think about entering a relationship.
5. You’re emotionally closed off
You just don’t feel the need to connect with someone emotionally. You clam up when it comes to talking about your feelings, and even if something hurts you or bothers you, you’d rather deal with it in your own way, instead of confronting the situation with the person involved.
If you are emotionally unavailable, it does not matter who you fall in love with, your detachment will eventually come to bite.