It can be easy to let one, or even all, of these unions slide, but “relationships, like every other aspect of our lives, take work,” says Cynthia Santiago-Borbón, a licensed clinical social worker who specializes in Latina wellness. “It’s about what you put into them — consistent, steady effort.” ready to roll up your sleeves and dive in? Start by getting to the root of the problem.
How to Love Better… With Your Partner
The issue: You’re in a romance rut.
The fix: You don’t need to book a tropical vacation to rekindle the fire. Try small acts of kindness that show big love. for example, “give each other a heartfelt hello and good-bye when you come and go,” says Gretchen Rubin, modern self-help guru and author of The happiness Project. Think: real hugs and legit kisses (on the lips!). These actions take only a second but can create lots of warm fuzzies first thing in the morning or after a rough day at work.
The issue: You’re snuggling with your phones instead of each other.
The fix: Be the change you want to see in your bedroom (or at your dinner table). Set a good example by charging your phone in another room, and focus on chatting up your partner instead. You can’t force him or her to follow suit: “the only person you can change is yourself,” Rubin says. But, funny enough, the people close to you tend to catch on quickly. “If one person in the relationship’s habits change, it will affect other people’s habits,” Rubin says, “for better or worse.”
The issue: He expects you to be his lover and his therapist. Read more