March 18, 2019

Can sex with a robot be the same? – Peju Akande

Can sex with a robot be the same? – Peju Akande

So in the past few days, I have been inundated with all kinds of videos on WhatsApp by my contacts, all pointing to one thing, artificial intelligence has taken over our lives; all areas of our lives, including the sex part of our lives.

Uh huh.

Ok, let me define what I am saying, It’s beyond coupling, its beyond bang, bang, bang aka Femi Kuti. I mean, have you seen the videos of hot looking android robots that can hold conversations, have a reserve of memories for your likes, dislikes, friends, family et al and the worst or best part, depending on how you want to view things; have great sex with …well lonely people. Oh well, they can have sex with anyone who wishes to, I guess.
So I began to think.

We are evolving as humans, the more we have, the less we seem to want what  we have. Relationships are dying these days because people are too focused on the devices they have in their hands to be bothered with holding meaningful conversations and developing relationships with other human beings around them. Man was born for relationships; remember even God said, ‘It is not good for man to be alone…’ and once our relationship status isn’t satisfied, it creates a vacuum.

That’s why you get messages reminding you to go outside and meet people, despite the thousands of friends you have on Facebook, many are still lonely, you find at family dinners everyone is preoccupied with their devices and so no conversations take place on the table anymore, at parties, people aren’t mingling, they are chatting on their phones or browsing, people are getting hooked online; so really it’s no surprise that some robotic engineers thought of filling this ever widening gap we are creating among ourselves with robots.
But tell me, who wants to have sex with a dummy? Ok, maybe these humanoids aren’t dummies, they are intelligent dummies (is there anything like this?)

So I read there are some guys who are quite excited at the prospect of being able to buy these humanoids and use them as girlfriends or live in lovers, however, their primary purpose is for sex; the humaniods are said to have orgasms as well.

No cooking, no bathing together or going out for dinner together to meet with other couples, just some hot looking sex on demand from a cold blooded dummy!
Here’s what ticking me off, I see some sort of madness here, I can’t get a grip on how these are supposed to be human alternatives; I understand robots being used as security agents; robots used in manufacturing and production of cars, bridges… robots manning traffic, robots sensitising humans against danger or detonating bombs but a robot for sex?

What the ****!

First off, to those applauding this creation, I suspect your needs aren’t really about having a relationship, I think it stems more from your need to control another ‘being’ much like how you control your devices. Yeah?
Anyway, engineers playing God created these lifelike women, (they still look like dolls to me); its easy to be attracted at first to their sexy hot looks, their fake lashes that blink repeatedly over soulless eyes- those glass eyes stare at you but will never see you for who you are; so picture this, you are making love to this humanoid, let’s call her Lisa, and you stare deep into Lisa’s eyes, what will you see? A reflection of yourself, I’m guessing Lisa’s eyes also serve as camera, recording your silly facial expressions as you try to make love to her. Except you like things like that, this will be a quick turnoff, I see you going flat even before you start.

Let’s imagine another scenario, so somehow you got into the groove with Lisa, kissing her, fumbling with her blouse…you know how you do your thing, you manage to get in; ‘bet she won’t arch her back to give you the right angle, neither would she be able to wrap her legs around you in pure passion, (the spring around the hinges may snap) but oh, she’ll make the right noises, continue to flutter her lashes and record your funny faces as you try to thrust in. (don’t worry, the engineers say she will be warm inside)

I guess Lisa would be able to read obvious mood signs, like when you get fired from your job or you lose a loved one or some disaster happens to you. She would shed tears for you, but they will never be real. Let’s talk about other emotions you require in a relationship, like the subtle signs lovers share. That wink across the room, that only you understand; when with friends, that secret joke you share that your friends don’t know about, what of that ever so slight nod you give one another to cue into something … will Lisa’s robot’s sensors pick these up?

I won’t argue with these engineers, I hope they know what they are doing but if it is isn’t a full blooded woman, it can never feel like a full blooded woman, so young man, go out there, drop the darned phone and create a relationship!


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