Have you met the Personal Assistant to the Holy Spirit? The one who also doubles as the Personal Assistant to the Trinity? This special somebody decides who goes to heaven and hell. There are plenty sef, more than one. You see them on the road daily, in buses, preaching and telling people that trousers, earrings, make up and etc is taking them straight to hell faya. If you party on Fridays and Saturdays, then go to church on Sunday morning, that one na straight road to hell faya. Like I said they are the PA to the Trinity, what do we know?
The day I met one of these special PAs, I was minding my business (I am always minding my business, but drama trails me). So I was minding my business, walking to where I will enter bus to the office when I saw two women preaching. One was preaching through a mega phone, the other was sharing tracts. Should I paint the picture? Ok, dark coloured overflowing clothes, hair tied in turban, no jewelries, face tight with their zeal to preach the gospel, not minding that it was a work day and people were busy trying to make it to their offices on time.
When I got close to them, Mummy tracts handed me one. I don’t collect tracts, especially Christian related tracts. The many version of Christianity have tire me, so everybody should worship God how they please, a.k.a, stay in your lane, and let me stay in mine.
As I was saying, she stretched her hand towards me, ‘my dear, take for your salvation.’ I smiled back, shook my head, ‘No, Thank you.’ That’s when the drama started. She acted like she didn’t hear me; she squeezed her face and stretched out the tract towards me again. Me: (my mind) your squeezed face will not force me to take the tract, but my mouth, gently said, ‘no, I don’t want.’
She was still standing in front of me, ‘please excuse let me pass,’ she no gree. Her face now changed and she said ‘If you don’t take this tract, I will remove the dust from my feet and on the last day it will rise up to testify against you.’
Ah! On top tract. Lol, I still won’t take it, if you like leave yourself on the ground. I won’t lie I was scared sha, but I still walked away without taking her tract. It was a few minutes later comprehension dawned on me, and then I laughed. I just met the special assistant to the Trinity.