Sex is subjective to the people involved but there are unspoken rules about what you should and should not do when you are in the act.
When you are in bed with your partner and planning to have sex, you do have certain things in your head that you want to do.
And the last thing you want to do is turn off your partner. Many relationships have been cut short because of what happened prior to having sex and the last thing you want to do is turn them off.
So we have compiled a list of the things you should not do when you are having sex.
Here we go:
1. Not kissing your partner
Believe this or not, kisses during sex not only tells your partner you are in tune with one another but also shows that you are committed to him or her, ready to take everything from the person and in short, kisses during sex brings you closer.
So whenever you are in the act, kisses are highly recommended and this will only add to the intense pleasure you derive from one another.
2. Ignoring everything but the sexual parts
The genitals are great to concentrate on during sex but you should definitely pay attention to other parts of your lover’s body and focus for some time on their entire body.
Especially during foreplay, endeavour to explore other erogenous zones like the ears, neck, knees, wrists, back, stomach, etc, rather than just the vagina or the penis.
Gently caressing these areas will excite your partner further and in turn, increase the chances of getting the same pleasure back from them.
3. Don’t put all your weight on your partner
During sex, some people tend to forget that they are on top of another human. Even if you’re a girl and you think you are lightweight, do not let him carry all your weight.
When you’re lying on top, you have to be careful not to drop all your weight on your partner as this can choke him or her and the essence of the sex will be lost. Chocking them or hindering their ability to breathe will kill the moment and chances are that they will not enjoy the sex.
4. Climaxing too soon or too late
Nothing kills sexual pleasure faster than one partner reaching orgasm too fast or too late. It can be so frustrating, especially for the woman if her man is the type generally referred to as the one-minute man.
If you climax too soon, you will your partner unsatisfied; and if it is too late, you will leave your partner feeling if they’re being punished.
To avoid this, spend a lot more time on foreplay as this will help you both get into the rhythm with one another. There is nothing more satisfying than two lovers climaxing together during sex or at most, few seconds apart.
5. Not warning your partner before you climax
This rule applies to both the man and the woman. If you’re going to let go, make sure your partner knows beforehand to prepare him or her for the big occasion. A simple warning that you are coming will prepare your lover to also get ready for the explosion. He or she deserves to know this big moment!
Telling your partner beforehand if you are about to climax will make it easier for you both as you may decide to hit the climax together or one party may plead for a delay.
6. Treating sex like a porn
Although some couples enjoy having raunchy sex, most people do not enjoy being treated like porn stars or sex machines who are only good for sex and nothing else.
Some will even feel debased when you treat your sex time as porn time.
Calling your woman nasty names during sex may sound like fun to you but chances are that she may not appreciate them and the next time you get under the sheets, she may not want to exhibit her real self. Don’t make her feel like a cheap slut just because you watched some porn movies with your friends and want to try it out on her.
7. Staying quiet during
Another no-no is staying quiet during sex like an Egyptian mummy. It sends the signal that you are not enjoying what is going on or that you are doing your partner a favour.
A little moan, some encouraging words, telling your partner you love what they are doing to you, telling him or her where to touch you, etc, brings spice into your sex life.
8. Mechanical act
It may feel comfortable for you to just pump away as you do at the gym, but you’ll quickly discover that most people don’t enjoy such an act. Mix it up a little bit; go fast at times, then slowly. Be creative and you’ll find yourself enjoying some variation too.
9. Answering the phone.
There is no greater killjoy during sex than when you pick up your phone during sex. It is certainly a major turn off and it will kill the mood in your partner faster than anything else.
10. Don’t make set conditions
This is not the time to request for that money or insist on a phone or laptop is given to you before sex takes place. Most people would end the relationship at that moment.