October 18, 2018

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Politicians on the Prowl! Secure Your Genitalia – Nkem Ndem

Politicians on the Prowl! Secure Your Genitalia – Nkem Ndem

There are certain fears a typical Nigerian will have while walking on the street or generally commuting from one part of the country. The fear that you will lose your way and get lost, the fear that you will come across a rabid dog that will chase and bite you, the fear that a random car may get off the road and hit you even while you are on the pedestrian lane or even the fear that you will get mugged.

Apparently, a Nigerian (especially of the male gender) has to also now nurse the fear of their genitalia being taken from them…and magically too.

In the last couple of months, the news media has been awash with reported incidents of ‘panic’ in which people get beaten, sometimes to death, after being accused of causing penises to shrink or disappear.

The victims usually believe and claim that a touch or “accidental” brush with the stranger caused the disappearance of their genitalia, and their penis was stolen in the same way that a pickpocket might steal a wallet. Not that their privates of these “victims” are originally detachable or malleable. It just disappears into thin air with no indication of blood, body fluids or trauma, as such they believe it is a supernatural occurrence or voodoo by people looking to get some form of benefit from the organ.

Now, the concern shown by victims of this penis-theft is not only for their sexuality, but also for their lives, since they believe that the condition may be life-threatening, if not reversed. Usually they would ask bystanders who they suspect to be the culprit to return their penis or face the possibility of being lynched.  

Most interesting was a recent case in Omole Phase 2, Ikeja Lagos, where a motorbike rider raised the alarm and held down a passenger who reportedly made his penis disappear after touching him with a magical ring. Luckily the police intervened, and police appealed to the angry onlookers challenging the suspect and asking him to return the penis, to let them handle the case, giving them the assurance that the allegation would be properly investigated. This incident happened just shortly after another incident where a politician purportedly made away with a stolen penis, somewhere around City Hall in Lagos State. The politician had allegedly, during a political gathering, given a security guard some money and the recipient’s penis disappeared but the politician let loose some gunshots and took off in his jeep before the man or police officials could catch up with him.

The incident with the bike man was sensationalized as someone with the handle @Sleeq2dabone recorded the entire incident on his phone and posted it on social media. He included the comment below:

Be vigilant guys! It’s election period and a lot of bizarre things are happening. Just a few minutes ago, a bike man’s manhood disappeared after being touched by some random guy right in front of my office. Thank God for my intervention and that of those around. The culprit has been handed over to the police. Please spread the information to your loved ones. We are protected in Jesus name.”

This incidents of penis-theft is not new, it has been occurring for ages, and not only in Nigeria. There have been cases in other African countries including Ghana, and Asian countries, including China. The reporter makes mention of election in his social media post, thereby suggesting that he believes that the series of penis-theft cases occurring recently, especially is due to the political season we are currently in. There is the general belief that politicians in Nigeria resort to voodoo and other occultic means to improve their chances of winning.

This includes killing innocent victims for ritual, bathing in public places, and a whole lot more.  Perhaps we should rejoice in the fact that, even with these new cases of penis theft, victims at least still have their life and only have to grapple with a life without an organ to excrete or reproduce. Then again, should women also now have to secure their own privates, especially their breast, as that is the most obvious?

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