March 19, 2019

See how woman got Mugabe in trouble – Kayode Oyero

See how woman got Mugabe in trouble – Kayode Oyero

This puzzle is for those of you who read your Bibles very well. Eve has Adam’s mumu button just as Grace has Grandpa Mugabe’s mumu button.

Okay, another one: If Eve made Adam fall from the Garden of Eden, then, Gucci Grace, the pedantic wife of Robert Mugabe made him fall from power.

Some women are boiling already. Awon feminist aye! But before you go gaga over this, patiently read the following points carefully.

You see, because of the love Grandpa Mugabe has for Gucci Grace, his second wife whom he married in 1996 after the death of the first one, he sacked Emmerson Mnangagwa, his vice president alias Crocodile. Or snake to be hit on head, if you let Grace tell the story. That was just last week o!

If you have been following Zimbabwe’s political roforofo for a while, you know already that Aunty Gucci Grace has been eyeing the post of the vice president since last December. You already know how Crocodile had a clash with Madam Grace and was told to go home. May even have been poisoned. A whole vice president sacked just like that in a democracy! I can’t imagine our good old general sack our cerebral prof. just like that! Can’t imagine our Sai Baba sack the president of the state of Ekiti despite his rancorous pontificating on his dear Aisha! Sorry, too much grammar.

Did we tell you that Crocodile’s only offence was stepping on Gucci Grace’s precious Ferragamo toes, just some sort of war of words between rivals? Just like the usual one between the president of Ekiti and our dear first lady.

Grandpa Mugabe was so inflamed. It was like a goat you have been eyeing to roast for suya and the goat now kicks your bucket of garri. Finish. Prayers answered. Grandpa spewed it fast: “How could he have stepped on those beautiful toes? How could he? O ya, you are fired!” Just like that.

The vice president had been seen as a main rival to Mrs. Mugabe in the internal fight over who might succeed the president who has been in power since 1980.

If you have been following the matter, you will know that it is no longer news that the sack of Mnangagwa is to make way for the love of grandpa’s life.

The sack of Crocodile and the sinister plot to install his sweetheart for life must have embittered Zimbabweans and the military, who know Grandpa Mugabe too well and have been waiting for such an opportunity to present itself.

Let us not forget that the so-called refuted coup is very likely because Mnangagwa enjoys esprit de corps with the military where he rose to the rank of general. The military won’t allow insult on one of their own. After all, once a general, always a general, abi?

Now, Grandpa has fallen from power; the military has taken over. His attempt to install Gucci Grace as heiress apparent to the throne foiled. Weeps.

Love is good. But if too much of it caused Adam’s fall from the Olympian height of the Garden of Eden to the dusty hard soil called earth, if love for Gucci Grace hypnotised Grandpa Mugabe so much that he sacked his deputy to install her in power, if love made Grandpa Mugabe so fall from power, abeg, beware of women o! They are fearfully and wonderfully made.


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