Come o, why have the Olympics never been held in Africa?

Come o, why have the Olympics never been held in Africa?

As someone who has covered the Olympics, I know that countries like China and Russia also had terrible planning and infrastructure related to the games, but because of their dictatorships, lack of access by the media and low numbers of brown-skinned people, “ghetto” did not become the narrative.

In fact, why have the Olympics never been held in Africa (I looked it up on Wikipedia, so that may or may not be true.) I’m sure the official response is that Africa lacks the infrastructure and financial means to host the games, but you know what the real answer is: Because they’re Black.

Russia built their buildings with spit and construction paper, and apparently the Zika virus is going to jumpstart the zombie apocalypse by Labor Day, so don’t call these Olympics “ghetto.” If they are going to refer to these Olympic games as “ghetto” I would like to offer a few suggestions to the International Olympic Committee on sports that we should institute into the games:

Slapboxing I’ve never understood why Boxing, Tae Kwon Do and Judo were Olympic Sports, but not slapboxing. If we are looking for a combat sport that doesn’t have the additional hazard of head trauma, why not include the sport practiced by Black men since 1802, when Jebediah Jenkins upset Ezekiel Jones to win the Hawthorne Plantation’s slapboxing championship? Since then, slapboxing has emerged as the number one sport of older brothers and street corner hustlers. It is time for it to come to the mainstream.

Shouting: If ballroom dancing, ice dancing and rhythmic gymnastics are all Olympic sports, then why not shouting? It would be one of the cheapest sports to add because all you need is a church organ, a drummer and a shouting area (tambourine optional). I tried to get this sport added a few years ago, but they presented a very valid question about the spectators:

What if everybody in the stands starts getting the Holy Ghost? Read more

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