July 19, 2018

This is How l stopped buying already peeled oranges – Lucia Edafioka

This is How l stopped buying already peeled oranges – Lucia Edafioka

Buying already peeled oranges is now a taboo as far as I am concerned. Why?  Read my story.

You know how when you’re in traffic, you see everything outside your window? That’s how my eyes started roaming o. I shouldn’t have looked I swear. This guy selling oranges was peeling the oranges in that fast magical way they do it (magic because the time I tried I peeled my hands too). So I was admiring the movement and the fine tiny green orange peels falling off. Suddenly the bros stopped, dropped knife and walked few feet away from his oranges, brought out his thing and started pissing.

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Ahn ahn, I wanted to look away, but my eyes couldn’t. Guy must have been carrying a loaded bladder because he pissed for a long time. That’s how bros finished, did that shaking thing guys do (don’t ask me how I know, you people should stop pissing along the road), put his thing back and grabbed le orange. My mind screamed no!!! I had expected him to wash his hands or something, clean them with rag sef, anything. He just finished, grabbed the half peeled orange from where he stopped and continued like nothing dey happen.

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In that instant I remembered all the peeled oranges I had ever eaten. Let’s just say I haven’t been able to buy oranges since then. I have been traumatized.

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3 Comments

  1. Edeeth

    In the part of the north I stay, you have people carrying meat on their head and shouting ‘Buy Meat!!!!!’
    Well, one day I heard it and I. Wanted to make sharp-sharp jollof, so I ran after him. I watched as he balanced the meat on the floor, squat beside it, brought out his JT, finished his business, carried his meat and continued screaming ‘buy meat!!!’. I can’t explain the speed I used while reversing! #NeverAgain.

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