March 21, 2019

What’s Wrong With Being Sexy?

What’s Wrong With Being Sexy?


The Music group, LMFAO probably painted sexy the way it’s been merchandised to the public since the 90’s and all of the 21’st century – scantily clad people hip thrusting their way to ecstasy or worse still, getting their way with an innocent victim hypnotized by the coquettish stares and suggestive body movements – and so, the gavel comes down, sexiness is devilish.

Delilah was sexy with her long nails and paints all over her face. Run away from sexy, it’s bad! That’s the general position for many. So sexiness is repressed, hidden and only allowed in the safety of darkness, behind closed doors or passworded phones. But should it?

Maybe it’s because the word itself is inseparably linked to ‘sex’ and thus always suggestive of sex (which isn’t demonic by the way) but has been so demonized that guilt is the next feeling that accompanies it after excitement.

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You see, excitement is an interesting word and it’s even more so when we note sexy actually also means exciting (that is, ‘sexually exciting’ as is the famous meaning), as in, that sexy new car.

Etymologically, they are Siamese twins, sex and sexy, so we all have to deal with it. The problem is the blanket negativity sexy carries in subtext about.

Recently Ace Musicians Tiwa Savage and WizKid ‘stewed’ social media with the Fever video and many people got to talking about the portrayal of sexiness by both artists.

The social-verse was agog with excitement as you’d expect when sexy is put out unashamedly in public.  But not everybody appreciated the art or even marketing genius the video exploited.

For some, it was irresponsible for Tiwa (I expect no less from a patriarchal society) to have been so ‘cozy’ in the video with Wizkid, a younger guy (never mind he is Africa’s biggest export to the world at the moment and a father of three). Well, I say why not, what’s wrong with being sexy?

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Barring the truism that ‘sex sells’ -which really did work for the Fever video breaking social media records for most watched Nigerian video on YouTube within a 24-hour period – sexiness is also instrumental to self-worth.

In fact, psychology puts it as part of the core markers of a healthy self-esteem; portraying confidence, self-acceptance, and an overall state of self-awareness as opposed  to self-consciousness.

Walk into an office, suited smartly and walking strong – that is sexy. Speak boldly to a superior, straddling between respectful and forthright and yes, that too is sexy.

Sexy can be many things unrelated to sex in itself and even when it does, why shouldn’t the state be explored all through and enjoyed, unapologetically?

If the word makes you squeamish, it may be an indication of some type of immaturity or worse still, an insecurity: emotional, mental or some other way.  Exhale and be sexy. It’s an expression of an elevated state of self-awareness.

Your scruples can inform what you do with your sexiness. We all have a duty to live as we deem right.

It’s like money, it isn’t inherently bad. What makes it bad is what it’s used for. If money excites you, however self-sufficient you are, why shouldn’t sexy?

The world needs sexy every bit as it needs money. Be unapologetically sexy.

The musical group, LMFAO put it quite succinctly; I’m sexy and I know it (barring the hip thrusting o). Be sexy too.

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